A Heart that Forgives - Song by Kevin Levar

I saw a link to this song on facebook and I thought the words were so powerful that I had to share! I have been meditating on this...learning to love like Jesus...This song just put everything I was thinking into words. So beautiful. Click here to listen to the music video on youtube.

I want a heart that forgives
A heart full of love
One with compassion just like Yours above
One that overcomes evil with goodness and love
Like it never happened, never holding a grudge
I want a heart that forgives that lives and lets live
One that keeps loving over and over again
One that men can’t offend
Because Your Word is within
One that loves without price, like You Lord Jesus Christ
I want a heart that loves everybody....even my enemies
I want to love like You, be like You, just like You did
I want a heart that forgives,

I want a heart that forgives!
When the ones that are closest, that I’ve known the longest, hurt me the most;
I still wanna love them just like You love me
Even though I’m hurting
I want a heart that forgives
When the pain is so deep, it’s so hard to speak, about it to anyone
Just like Your Son, I give up my right to hold it against them with hatred inside
I want a heart that loves everybody....even my enemies
I wanna love like You, be like You, just like You did
Wanna walk like You, talk like You, just like You did,
Wanna be like You, live like You, just like You did
'Cause the heart that forgives is the heart that will live
Totally free from the pain of the past
And the heart that lets go is the heart that will know so much freedom

Lord I wanna let it go
God I need to let it go
Lord its been holding me back
And I don't want it, I don't want it, I don't
I don't want it no more
I don’t know exactly what to do to get rid of it, but ah...
Here I am Lord Jesus, here I am ohh, here I am Lord Jesus...ohh
Lord I need You, I need You, I know this is me that You're talking to
This is me, this is me, this is me Lord, this is me
Lord I let it go, every person, every person that's ever hurt me
God I let it go
Every single hurt
God I let it go
Every single pain
God I let it go, I let it go, I let it go
Lord You can have it, Lord You can have it,
Lord You can have it, Lord You can have it,
You can have it now, You can have it now,
'Cause I don't want it no......more

At the Crossroads of a Friendship

What to do?

I struggled with deciding what to do with my friendship about Jamie…Was it wrong for me to “abandon” our friendship because Jamie might be down and out but not saying so? Would it be wrong for me to stop being “friends” with Jamie? Could I stop being friends with Jamie and still love Jamie? Again, what with Jesus do?

As I struggled with these thoughts, I became tearful…Once again I found myself in a situation where a seemingly close friend is abandoning me. Why does this always happen to me? What is it about me that I attract these friends that cannot stand the test of time? Why am I not worth fighting for? Is something wrong with me???

Loving Friends Despite…

Is it wrong to sever ties with a “friend” who no longer fulfills the role of a friend? Is it possible to still love that person yet not be friends? What would Jesus do? The Bible talks about loving everyone, especially your enemies…What good is it if a man only loves those who love him…The Bible suggests that it is easy to love those who love us but very difficult to love those who do not love us. I am learning more and more how true that is. 

I used to think that I didn’t have enemies. I thought enemies came in the form of people who were blatantly against you…People who would desire the worst for you…People who were against your very being. But I realized that enemies don’t come dressed as scary monsters that we sometimes think of. Enemies can grow up right in your back yard…Or even in your own house…They come dressed as siblings, friends, mothers, fathers, spouses, family members and church members. They are the people you least suspect…The people you give your all too…And they are the people who often hurt you the most. So the question of the day is, how do you love them when they don’t love you…Or seemingly don’t love you…If I had the scary monster enemies, that would be easy…BUT they are so far removed from my life that I don’t even know they exist. But those people in my back yard…The ones I see all the time…How do you love them despite their lack of love?

Empty Amens

The preacher preached a good sermon today…I told him that it was a great message…He said, “don’t let it be great and not apply it…Because it becomes nothing if it is great but we do nothing…” I can only imagine how that must be the bane of many a preachers…Studying, researching, preaching and teaching their hearts and souls out so they can encourage and edify the church…Yet time after time, we hear folks bellow a hearty amen, a rowdy applause, and a “well done brother preacher…” But see little if any changes. I can only imagine how heart breaking that is to a preacher…

Same blog….NEW LOOK!!!

I am super happy to reveal the new look of my blog. With the help of my girl Kristal, and her excellent teaching skills, my blog has a new look and feel that is so me. I was joking with her and telling her that my blog looked like a kindergartner designed it! Now, I feel so proud of it, I want to show it off to the world! It is now a blog I can be proud of. YAAAY!!! THANK YOU Kristal!!! You are just so special to me!

Kristal so willingly and graciously offered to teach me a few blogging tricks. She came over Friday night and said that it would probably take a couple hours…FIVE hours later, this was revealed! Unfortunately, Kristal did not know that I used to ride the special bus for school...I am a slow learner who catches on fast! Lol. There is still a lot to learn, do and change…But for now I am MOST content with my pink and brown design theme. I can’t wait to learn more tricks of the trade, but I will have to give Kris a few months to recover from this latest teaching gig! 

Being True to Your Relationships

An overwhelming feeling of sadness came upon me today as acknowledged to myself and my husband that I have not been true to my close relationships. Little by little, thing by thing, day by day, I allowed personal hurts to be swept under the rug with one relationship or another. I know it…I am conscious of it…I know it’s not like me to “avoid conflict.” But I am…and I have…

I need to apologize to my friend for not being true…for not being honest…and for allowing my hurts to go unnoticed…Resulting in my sadness today. My friend is none the wiser…She does not know how I feel, or how long I have been feeling this way…She thinks everything is fine! And everything is fine…Well for the most part. There are just one or two or three things that have bothered me…But I have not brought it to her attention and so she does not know…It’s not her fault…because I should have been honest.