Today I worked late and as I was driving home I was silently praying that the kids would already be asleep while wishing that I didn’t feel that way. As I drove home I grew anxious…almost dreading the inevitable…my kids, my WIDE AWAKE kids!! I tried to suppress the impending dread by replacing it with beautiful thoughts of two little people greeting me with BIG HUGS and smiles and love as they normally do. I tried to remind myself that I LOVE them to pieces…I do…I really do…I tried to imagine a peaceful bedtime with no screaming…just stories and sweet lullabies…I imagined a fairy tail, where I am transported to this beautiful land where there is only laughter and happiness, rainbows and sprinkle cookies.
Children are a gift from God. But they can sometimes feel like a burden. They take a lot from us emotionally and have the potential to suck the life force out of us. A few weeks ago Alexis put me to bed…I mean, after 2 hours of tantrums and sheer and utter emotional torture of watching my sweet darling baby go from a baby to a toddler right before my eyes I laid on my bed and cried. I was exhausted…emotionally exhausted. This is parenting.