I have become absolutely disenchanted with the frills and fancies of weddings! It really bothers me that people spend so much money on a wedding and so much time and energy planning a wedding…YET so LITTLE time planning and preparing for marriage. The wedding is one day…ONE day of “happiness” that DOES NOT LAST…A marriage can be a lifetime of happiness if you take your time to plan and prepare yourself….hmmmm? I would choose the lifetime of happiness!
But one may ask…Can’t you have both? Of course you can…Many people (though few and far between) actually spend a great deal of time planning and preparing for marriage…They read relationship building books, they speak to spiritual couples and seek wisdom, they engage in REAL pre-marital counseling and a host of other stuff. ..And then they have a wonderful celebration of their union at the end of their planning…I love being a witness to those weddings! But I am inclined to believe that the majority of folks become so wrapped up in the details of a wedding that they forget the details of life…the details of marriage…the details of family…and the details of friends…
Take for example your willingness to spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on a dress…A dress that you plan to wear only once…Yet your unwillingness to spend $150 to see your sister graduate (under the guise that you have no money)…That seems pretty strange to me…Hmmm, no money to spend on friends and family, the things that are supposed to be the most meaningful things in your life…Yet lots of money to waste on a day…Here is another example…We cannot visit our family for Christmas or Thanksgiving because we don’t have any money. Yet, we chose to spend $20,000 on the wedding…Looking back on it, that $500 I spent on wedding favors could have very well paid for our trip home…Favors or spending Christmas with family? I chose family!
So what’s more important the frills of a day? Or the financial freedom to spend your money on the things that matter most…time with family and friends? Hmmm? I vote for the time spent with family and friends.
But the wedding is a once in a lifetime opportunity you say…Really? And because you know that your parents are going to live forever and your friends will always be there, that justifies taking that for granted? Hmmm….
And as a side note…I don’t ever want to be asked to be anyone’s bridesmaids ever again. What is even the purpose of bridesmaids…So you can have a few girls who are supposededly close to you, wear a $150+ dress, $50 shoes, and how much ever in accessories…for what purpose?? As part of the decorations? To look good? I really don’t see the point of bridesmaids. Especially when trouble hit your marriage you doh even call one ah dem. Steups…What is the point…Is it just for show? I do feel like that sometimes...And I dont want to be part of a show...I want to be part of your life!
You are probably wondering why I sound so disenchanted with weddings and bridesmaids…Well get this…I have been in exactly 4 CHRISTIAN weddings…Two ended in divorce in less than 3 years…But yes, we got all dressed up, looked pretty, details and decorations that took months to plan and prepare were all there…And now what…IT does not mean a thing now that they are divorced or their marriage fell apart…
I am disenchanted…
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