Today I worked late and as I was driving home I was silently
praying that the kids would already be asleep while wishing that I didn’t feel
that way. As I drove home I grew anxious…almost dreading the inevitable…my
kids, my WIDE AWAKE kids!! I tried to suppress the impending dread by replacing it with
beautiful thoughts of two little people greeting me with BIG HUGS and smiles
and love as they normally do. I tried to remind myself that I LOVE them to
pieces…I do…I really do…I tried to imagine a peaceful bedtime with no screaming…just
stories and sweet lullabies…I imagined a fairy tail, where I am transported to
this beautiful land where there is only laughter and happiness, rainbows and
sprinkle cookies.
Children are a gift from God. But they can sometimes feel
like a burden. They take a lot from us emotionally and have the potential to
suck the life force out of us. A few weeks ago Alexis put me to bed…I mean,
after 2 hours of tantrums and sheer and utter emotional torture of watching my
sweet darling baby go from a baby to a toddler right before my eyes I laid on
my bed and cried. I was exhausted…emotionally exhausted.
This is parenting.
