The day before the wedding-
I look at her and I can’t help but smile…She’s so beautiful… Her heart is amazing…and her love for God just overflows to everyone she meets. I love her…I love her for the breath of inspiration she gives me…I love her for her self-sacrificing to make me happy…I love her because she loves others…I love her because she loves God more than she loves me…And the best part about it is that she is mine! God sure smiled on me :) :)…And tomorrow we would be able to enjoy each other as married people do ;-).
The honeymoon –
Her soft gentle kisses brings a chill up my spine…She is so sexy and I just can’t imagine getting to know her more…I can get used to this! Man, this is the life! She makes me so happy…And I want to spend the rest of my life with her!
After the honeymoon –
I want to be a good leader. I want to be a good provider. I have a huge responsibility to lead my family to heaven. I wonder sometimes if I am doing okay. I sometimes doubt my ability to be a good leader, a good man…
Beyond the honeymoon-
I’m sensing a bit of negativity creeping in. I am not sure what happened or when it happened but it seems that I can’t do anything right! Every day I am met with either subtle or overt criticism. Last week I forgot to take the trash out, yesterday I didn’t wash up, today I was not romantic enough…What will tomorrow hold???
She doesn’t seem to remember all the other times I try…All the other days I take the trash out or wash up…I barely get a thank you or a glimmer of appreciation…What’s up with that? I mean, I am trying here! And not once do I hear her say she appreciates my efforts…NOT ONCE!
It seems that every time I attempt to be intimate with her she has an excuse…Either she’s tired, or sick, or has PMS, or just simply not interested. I just don’t get it! Eventually I just stopped trying…I was just tired of the rejection man…
The worst is the one time we “do it” and she seems unfulfilled…She’s barely engaging and basically she just lies there…seemingly absent minded…Who is this woman? Where is the woman I married??? Then she has the audacity to tell me that I am not doing it right…I am not trying to please her and I am just trying to please myself. WHAAAAT?!
I’ll end with this one…
I am starting to feel that she no longer respects me. There have been several occasions where she made me feel stupid for either an idea I had for us or about something I forgot to do. The other day she totally flipped out because I invited my parents over for the weekend. She acted as though I killed someone…Instead of understanding that my parents live very far and we only get to see them ever so often…Instead of understanding that, she makes me out to be a stupid, and insensitive husband…
I can’t seem to do anything right! I can’t seem to make her happy! Everything I do is met with criticism! And I never once get any thanks for the effort and energy I put out…Sometimes I wonder, why I even bother. What’s the use of trying…
Where is the woman I married?
lol are you sure this is fictional?
ReplyDeletepretty spot on. but... ah there is always a but. we do stop trying and its easy to blame "rejection" truth is we get comfortable and don't feel like we should have to "fight" for it like we did before we were married. also the way we show love is not always the way our wives accept love.
ReplyDeletedoesn't negate our need for respect and recognition of the things we do. but such is the complexity of relationship.
Yes fictional...:-) in a sense. I think the feelings are there in most every relationship at some point or another...The difference may be the types "problems" that give way to the feelings and how we react to it. I believe that both husband and wife have to have a fight for their relationship...Once the fight is gone laziness can come in...the desire to try harder goes away...etc. etc...
ReplyDeleteHaving a servant heart means that I will try to serve him the way he wants to be served and he would do the same for me...both our needs would be met and we would both derive happiness knowing that we are pleasing our mate...
The question is...how do we keep the drive to have a servant heart and not get lazy?